This was my Halloween, shared late i know, but sitting at the computer and going through the photos was a further pain to my migraine filled head that has lasted almost a solid week.
Going back to Sunday a headache hit at the back of my head like a pumpkin had just been thrown towards my noggin, or even as if I’d just been stabbed with the knife used to carve such! It made me feel ill and did not subside for hrs after its beginning. Later that night i lay in bed trying to get some sleep and couldn’t help but roll up in the foetal position due to such pain.
I then went and did this…
Feeling dramatic as anything since i rarely go see a doctor when ill let alone the hospital, I drove myself to A&E at 2 in the morning. Something just was not right and i couldnt bare lie in bed thinking my brain was turing to mush and my life was about to end. I honestly asumed they’d laugh at me, call me a complete hypochondriac and send me packing upon arrival… but at least I’d sleep without the thoughts of near impounding doom.
After ariving and describing my symtoms i was taken into zone2 of the emergency area and placed on a bed in the hall. Didnt take long for them to take my blood and insert a drip. At this point i felt rediculous, because lets face it, i had simply come in for a headache….
Anywhooo, not long past and an abundance of docters and nurses were getting me to repeat my symptoms to each one of them… aka, a stabbing headache which had turned me into a vegetable. After several doses of pain killer and no let up of pain, they decided to roll me in for a CT scan.
So there I was lying in a machine wondering ‘what the hell was wrong’ in severe terror. I had genuinely believed i was being over cautious at the beginnings of all this, so after the scan my mind began to wonder. I was left hours lying in bed waiting to here my fate when they finally come back with the news that the scan seemed fine but my noticeable agony (even after painkillers) resulted in them wanting more tests… what sort? a fucking Lumbar Puncture.
A Lumbar Puncture (Spinal Tap) is quite simply (and slightly exaggerated) this… they ram a needle in the lower back to gather, in a tube, some of your cerebrospinal fluid. It is usually done to test for meningitis, but also to determine if there is BLEEDING IN THE BRAIN (I was freaked). After this small procedure i did not only have a miniature war in my head, but also a severe cripling pain in my lower back and was walking like a duck. What came from this? MORE painkillers… they didn’t work. Fuck!
Now, when that result then came back from the lumbar puncture… MASS FREAK-OUT was had on my part….
I had red blood cells in my cerebrospinal fluid.
At this point i was terrified and genuinely started to think; ‘SWEET FUCK BAGS, my brain is bleeding, im going to die!!’ Dramatic yes, but try lieing on a hospital bed, ridddled with pain killers, still in agony with cerebrospinal fluid complications.. yeah, FREAKED!
Also to add at this point… I possibly hadn’t mentioned to anyone i was even in A&E and it was now 3pm on Monday afternoon. I was completely on my own, lying in a hospital bed, situated in the corridor. So to repeat myself, I was FREAKED!
Once i was breathing again after the news of such a Lumbar puncture result, I was told that i was going to have to go for another CT scan… but with a differance… DYE. The dye was to be added to my veins to show my brain in detail and so I needed another, bigger, needle inserted into now my left arm for the tube, brilliance!
Now I was at the point I had to inform people I was even in the hospital. I let the boyfriend and the mother know where I was, what was going and that I’d let them know the result of this second scan in due course once I knew. They were completely shocked, and completely taken back from such news… ooops, my bad!
This second scan was not fun, nor easy. I lay on the bed to go through the machine when another nurse comes in to rob my spot for a different patient. I had to get off the rack for the scan and get back onto my bed to wait a further 20 minuts. Evenutally i got to do take two of this scan and was informend this; ‘You will feel a hot flush upon the dyes entry, you will experience a metal taste in your mouth directly after, to be followed with the sensation you’ve just taken a piss’…
So im lying on the bed, about to go through the machine and then BAM… hot flush of all sorts, my brain felt like it was on fire and it tasted as if id just licked an empty tin can. Then, FUCK, i genuinely thought id wet myself. Face went reder then fire and mortifaction completely set it. What was i to do? In a hospital. By myself. With nothing but urinated bottoms… but no it was just a sensation which is even wierder indeed. My pants were clean and dry. Relief (no pun intended)!
So what was meant to only be a 30-45 minute wait for the result of this scan was actually an agonizing 1hr and 35 minutes of me FREAKING out and thinking further that I was about to die. I mean, why would it be taking so long? Did they find more problems? Were they drawing straws on who was to tell me my death was near?..
Not so much, but i think I deserved the write to think such..
Eventually the doctor came over and told me that I shouldn’t be worried, the scan seemed ok but i was to stay another night to be looked at by the neurologist in the morning. Also to have an MRI scan… I was now TERRIFIED TO THE MAX, only nurses had really been to see me up until this point. Also why would the neurologist need to see me at all unless something was wrong? FAAAACK!
I had been by myself now for over 16hrs lying in this bed so was delighted to be moved to a cubicle just in time to get a visit from the mother followed by the boyfriend. Mother brought me jammies and Richard brought me cuddles and card games. I could finally smile. Was awesome :)
Once visiting hours came to an end I had my heart rate taken and it was beeping for unknown reasons to me. I was left in terror with no information coming my way to WHAT THE FUCK was wrong. I asked countless nurses for a briefing but got nothing. I did however, finally get to have dinner which pleased me greatly, even if it was on my own. I didn’t care what it was as I was so hungry after nibbling on nothing but brown bread for the day since every-time the cart came round for food i declined thinking ANY MOMENT id be free to go home to make myself a feast.
After a sleepless night the doctor comes in in the morning to tell me all seems GRAND. They went and changed their minds about the morning plans and I now did not need to see the neurologis, or have the MRI scan. I was both so relieved and insanely pissed off that I’d stayed the night, for no reason at all. But with that said, I was mainly feeling relieved. My brian was not bleeding out like a can of burst heinz and i would live… HURRAH. I was simply diagnosed with a woeful migraine after all of that, which still continues till now.
Eventually, two hours after being told I could go they finally removed the iv drips from my arm. This was not until my own blood had started moving from my arm, up the tube robbing me of my juicy red nectar.
What a way to end my visit. Went in with headache. Came out with that and an added crippled back pain. Joys! It was a halloween from hell and by brain is still in bits.
Until next time,
– The girl with the [Train Tattoo]